What Needs to End In Order For You To Grow?
Jul 03, 2023Life is composed of an intricate sequence of seasons and transitions, and with each turn, we are presented with new challenges, opportunities, and, at times, necessary endings. This notion of a 'necessary ending' is a concept we all grapple with at various junctures in our lives. Be it a personal project, business strategy, relationship, or even a phase of life, recognizing that an ending is needed can sometimes be the key to unlocking the next chapter of our lives. As you reflect on your current circumstances, ask yourself, "What season of life am I in, and is it time for a transition?"
Often, the difficulty arises when we cling to the belief that the current season is permanent. This misguided notion can stifle our growth and hinder us from transitioning into a new season or way of doing things. To navigate this, consider, "Am I holding on to something believing it's permanent, and is this hampering my ability to embrace change and progress?"
Ending a relationship is particularly challenging, especially when it's not because the season has run its course, but rather due to destructive patterns of behavior, irresponsibility, or addiction exhibited by the other person. These are tough choices but sometimes necessary. Question to ponder here is, "Are there relationships in my life that are causing more harm than good, and is it time for a necessary ending?"
In my book, 'Necessary Endings', I compare the concept of necessary endings to gardeners pruning plants. Pruning isn't random cutting, but a calculated decision to allow for better growth. Similarly, it's important to continuously reassess our commitments against our future vision and prune away what no longer aligns. A question to guide this process could be, "Are there commitments or activities in my life that no longer align with my future vision, and do they need to be pruned?"
Pruning also involves letting go of things that aren't improving despite our best efforts and removing what's already dead or non-functional to make space for new growth. Ask yourself, "Are there aspects in my life that are no longer serving me, and how can I let go to create space for growth?"
Remember, not all relationships should end. Some need persistent effort to improve. However, there may be a necessity for an ending to old strategies that aren't working, in favor of new, more effective ones. So, a final question to reflect upon is, "Are there strategies in my life that are no longer effective, and is it time to end these and find new, more effective approaches?" By asking these questions, you can navigate necessary endings and pave the way for personal growth and new beginnings.